Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
