They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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