too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
