I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize