i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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