I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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