I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
