i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize