I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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