Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
there is glitter all over my balls
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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