i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
