hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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