I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
