what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize