8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
