it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out mid-signature
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
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