we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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