P.S. I can't hear my feet
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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