you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
