Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
