ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
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He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
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After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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