i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
