Who did Billy Mays play for?
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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