living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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