The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Sober January is a disaster.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
