Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
