I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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