Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
