Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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