a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
