Don't you send me to vm
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I feel great
I just peed on a car
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
