It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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