yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
