you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
