He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
