Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize