Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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