Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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