i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
bring money and cleavage
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
They have beer where we have blood.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
