you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize