i would punch a child for taco bell
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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