I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Dicks are not precious.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
