Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Panties = found
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