so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
