I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Randomize
