Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
