When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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