real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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