i just google imaged poop.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
