You work out of a Hotel?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
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